Why You Need a Retreat

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I just came back from a retreat, and it was magical.

 Well, not really. Just a group of physicians connecting in nature, doing reflective activities together, and not adhering well to the set schedule because of all the side conversations…

It’s the feelings I have now that make it a magical experience. Calm. Presence. Understanding. Connection. I miss my fellow retreat attendees.

So what is a retreat? If you look up the word retreat in the dictionary, it might give you a more directional meaning, something like the process of withdrawing or moving back, kind of like retreating from a war in the military.

But in this application, a retreat is a place or an event you go to that causes you to withdraw inward. To go back to basics, back to connection, to reflection, to simple pleasures, and maybe even a reconsideration of your priorities. You could consider a retreat a cornerstone action of self-care, kind of like a “re-treating yo-self” when you either haven’t been considering what you need or you haven’t been very present with yourself.

Why do physicians and other high octane professionals need to do retreats?

Because we’re all somewhere on the continuum of burnout, sometimes a little more crispy than other times.

Because there’s also such a thing as the treadmill of achievement that lures us with its comparisons and its external metrics of success. It’s always there and it’s very enticing.

Also because with our complex lives and vast responsibilities to many different people, patients, clients, family members and friends.

It’s easy to lose sight of your personal priorities and get bogged down in the day-to-day of putting out fires. A retreat can remind you of who you really are, what your vision is, and how you might have stepped off track and can get back to where you want to be.

The retreat I just came back from is called the Revitalize: Physician Renewal Retreat, and this was organized by my friend Dr. Mary Wilde, a pediatrician in St. George, Utah. And I was lucky enough to meet her through another old friend of mine named Mary, who’s also a physician. Mary Wilde was on the talking about being a multi-passionate physician balancing clinical work with teaching running retreats for physicians and patients, and also parenting eight boys (!).

The locale was about two hours from Las Vegas, NV, and it happens to be about an hour away from Zion National Park and about an hour to an hour and a half away from where I call home. A group of 18 strangers met at the Red Mountain Resort in Ivins (on the outskirts of St. George). We experieced workshops: I led one on the topic of resilience, and others were on entrepreneurship in medicine, spirituality, poetry and writing, art, and mindfulness. We had journaling sessions, meditation sessions, a chance to hike and do yoga in the beautiful red rocks of Snow Canyon State Park, and the “piece de resistance” – a day hike in the majestic Zion National Park (a bucket list item for many of the attendees).

There were men and women physicians (plus two physician assistants) from all parts of the country practicing many different specialties. All except two of them I had never met, yet I connected deeply with each one of them. This week, I’m feeling like I kind of miss them.

We went from strangers to hugging each other and shedding tears together in a period of two and a half days. When you have an immersive experience with other people, you bond with them very quickly, and this is some of the magic behind the retreat. Here are some other benefits:

You will make friends

It is hard to make friends as an adult, is it not? Women professionals often say this because they may not completely align with coworkers or other community members (such as at kids’ schools), and men report having difficulty making friends as adults as well. You will have an instant new group of friends after you go on a retreat like this.

You will grow your confidence

The elements of confidence that I teach in my Lean Out Confidence Course are self-knowledge, mental fitness, doing hard things, and embracing a journey mindset. When you go on a retreat, you’re basically practicing three of the four elements. You’re taking time for stillness and reflection, and you will likely learn something about yourself when you connect with others, and when you participate in some of the reflective activities. You’re spending time flexing your mental muscles by practicing mindfulness.

You are also doing hard things by taking a risk, making an investment, and going on a trip where likely you don’t know anyone, and it might be in a place that you’ve never been. People were sharing vulnerably in some of the exercises that we did, and that is also a difficult thing to do. So when you get out and do something new and you do some exercises that involve drawing and poetry (as we did), it’s likely out of your element.

You will return transformed

You may experience transformation, or you may help others to experience transformation, or both. When I went on a yoga retreat a few years ago, I experienced a transformative realization. I felt like I was at a crossroads professionally; my locum assignments had dried up, and I hadn’t started my regular per diem job I have now. I didn’t know if maybe we were going to another child because we were in the middle of a surrogacy journey, and we had moved onto our homestead. I was feeling lost in terms of my identities. But over the few days I was on the retreat, I realized something really powerful and wonderful:

I already had everything I needed right in front of me in the present moment.

The present had the answers, and I didn’t need to worry about all the directions and choices that I had been worrying about.

If you’re feeling lost, a retreat will definitely help you. If you aren’t feeling lost but you would like a shakeup of your routine and to experience something new, a retreat would also be great for you. When you connect with other professionals going through similar or even very different trials, you will realize that you’re not alone in your struggles. You may even get some inspiration or ideas from people on how to get unstuck.

You will form new friendships and networks that can benefit you on a personal level, but also maybe in professional levels. When you share your own personal journey, you’re likely to inspire others in some way. And you’re also able to reflect on all you’ve done with immense gratitude. I definitely experienced this on this last week.

What about you? Have you ever gone on a retreat? Would you consider going on a retreat? Leave your thoughts in the comments below!