Scheduling Your Balance: My Summer of Lake

(Note: If you’d like to listen to this post as a podcast episode, scroll to the bottom!)

There’s something about summer that makes me want to have a fun goal.

Not just any goal… a goal that involves having fun.

I remember always trying to make goals like that as a kid in school – something like, “I’m going to win this entire Super Mario Bros game this summer” or “I’m going to go to the water park at least 10 times.”

But when you get older, summers become about research positions or summer internships – something you need to beef up your resume or your professional school application. And then, of course, you start working… and very few of us get summers off in our jobs.

At this point in our lives, if we want to infuse a sense of fun into the summer, we’ve got to be intentional about it.

In a recent Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast, Gretchen and her sister Liz talked about what their summer themes were going to be. I’ve been listening to the show for years, now, and every May there’s always a discussion on this. The themes are often things like reading books by a specific author, listening to a certain genre of music, or going to the art museum every day.

I’ve decided that this summer is going to be the Summer of Lake.

Our mountain homestead is about seven or eight miles down the road from a beautiful alpine lake – one that people from surrounding areas and even other nearby states pick as a destination every summer. There are three campgrounds on the edge of this lake, a primitive but quaint lodge with its own little community, cabins, and mountain biking trails. What’s not to love? The water’s cold but unbelievably clear, surrounded by aspens and pines and it’s literally RIGHT THERE.

Yet we’ve been living here for a few summers now, and we don’t take advantage of the lake like we should. Aside from bad weather days, there always seems to be some project or work thing (or just laziness of not wanting to deal with logistics) that pulls us away from going to the lake. I absolutely love standup paddling, and we have the equipment… but we don’t always have the motivation. We probably average less than 5 visits each season.

But this summer, it’s going to be different. I’m not going to promise every single week, but I’m rearranging my schedule so that I can get there regularly, even if it’s just for a short paddle. I’ve decided I’m going to try for either Sunday or Monday mornings. Morning times are best because of course the water’s calmest, so it’s on me to make time on those mornings. On Sunday mornings, we have a regular ritual of doing a FaceTime session with each set of grandparents, so I’ll have to organize myself to get ready before that. And on Mondays, I was often scheduling interviews for the show. I’ve now blocked off a bunch of time on Monday mornings this summer and will interview at different times during the week.

In my most recent interview on the Lean Out Podcast, Dr. Una said one of her key tips is to schedule in your balance, your self-care, and things like hanging out you’re your family that “should” seem obvious. If you need to put little joyful moments on your calendar, there’s nothing wrong with you! We live in a fast-paced world with many, many distractions; anyone can quickly lose track of what’s really important to them.

I also recently heard this episode of the Ed Mylett show where he talked about what he learned from focusing on QTR. He’s in his 50’s (join the club), had some health issues, his father passed away fairly recently, and his kids are grown and out of the house. I really resonated with his concept of QTR.

What is it?

It stands for Quality Time Remaining.

How many more years do you have on this earth? How many more summers with your kids? How many more visits from your elderly parents? It’s not the easiest thing to think about, but it’s reality. And hopefully, it will prompt you to think about how you can spend your quality time. Our recent experience with grief got me fired up about making the most of what’s left of life.

It’s the stoic concept of Memento Mori. It means “remember we all must die”.

We’re often in such a hurry to do things that aren’t really that important in the grand scheme (like checking email or replying to a text), yet we live as if we have lots of time to get to the stuff that really matters (like spending time with the people you love, traveling to a desired location, or doing the things that bring you tremendous joy).

QTR is about intentional memory making: not necessarily checking off bucket list items and capturing it for the ‘gram, but making memories in the everyday moments. Ed told this story during the show about a person who worked and worked and never went on a vacation, then planned a big trip to Europe for right after his retirement, and never got to take it because he died a week before the trip.

There was a physician in the department where I used to work. He was very well-liked, an amazing person, and a highly decorated physician. His wife was an OR nurse, and she used to say, “I just wish he would retire.” They had enough money, they were healthy and active in their late 60’s, and for a few years she would openly badger him about this. He finally retired, and within a year, he died of leukemia.

We don’t have control over things like if we will get cancer, but we do have control over the present and how we choose to spend it.

So I’m going to try to spend more time at the lake.

In medicine, we spend many years in a mode of delayed gratification. If you’re out of training, I’d like to remind you: you don’t have to do that anymore. You’re in charge now. If you’ve been thinking of cutting back or getting rid of a draining aspect of your work, do it. Don’t wait.

What do you want to focus on right now? What could be your summer theme? What QTR moments are you going to create? Share your thoughts by leaving a comment below!