How I Do Work-Life Balance

[To listen to this article as a solocast, scroll to the bottom of this post]

Happy Labor Day! If you look up the holiday, it will ironically say something about a “tribute to the achievements of American workers”. But you know how I feel about the word achievement 😄

If you delve deeper, the holiday’s origins are related to people working long hours in the industrial revolution, protesting for better working conditions.

It’s interesting to think about the kind of work done at that time vs. the vast kinds of things people do at work now.

Since Labor Day is all about work, It’s a perfect time for you to reflect on your work situation. How’s it going? What do you like about your work? What would you like to change?

In honor of Labor Day, I thought I’d pull back the curtain on some nuts and bolts of my balance, and share four main points, or personal philosophies if you will, about work-life balance.

It’s a constant process

That’s why I named my business Practice Balance. With a practice, you’re never done, it’s never perfect. “Practice makes perfect” is a dumb saying, btw… if you are still trying to be perfect, you’ll find yourself living in a state of disappointment. Perfectionism is a compensatory behavior born out of anxiety and shame.

The saying should really be “practice makes progress”. This was in my daughter’s homeschool math video lesson the other day, and I’m adopting it!

I tend to re-evaluate my balance at regular intervals. Probably on the frequency of seasons b/c, living off-grid in the mountains, some aspects of our lives must change with the seasons. I look at what’s coming up on the calendar for me and my family, and I start thinking about my priorities from there.

It’s all about triage

Similar to my ideas on self-care triage, balance is about priorities, and triage can be applied to macro and micro levels. You need to understand what you really value, and prioritize those things over others. It doesn’t mean you don’t care about some things, it just means they aren’t the priority NOW.

I choose to work clinically part time. When I’m on a clinical assignment, I tend to give myself grace in other areas of my life. I only work on creative projects if I’m really feeling inspired. I try to work out but only if it doesn’t cut into my sleep. I still cook food, but I don’t make elaborate recipes – I just focus on the basics. I throw some meat and vegetables into the air fryer, put some frozen berries in a bowl, top it with yogurt and be done.

If you feel overwhelmed by all the things you have to and want to do, try an exercise from my book. Write down you to-do list, and then categorize the items in three columns:

FOCUS                      LET SLIDE                    IGNORE ALTOGETHER

Do this for a 3-6 month period, and then re-evaluate and repeat based on new priorities for the next time period.

You may not be able to work part-time right now. You might say, “Well, when will I have time to do some slow cooking or work on a creative project like a book or a blog?” If these things matter to you, you will find time when you’re not working to fit them into your life. I believe in NOT saying “I don’t have time.” You can make time for whatever you want to do. I think the key is letting go of perfection. Which leads me to my next point…

Embrace flexibility

Not only do I let go of perfection, I let go of things having to be a certain way. My home is not pristinely clean, for example. It doesn’t matter to me as much as other things. Another one: daughter doesn’t wash her hair as often as I’d like.  Sometimes I’m away from her on a clinical assignment, and I cannot control other people from afar. Trying to make everything just so is a recipe for unmet expectation and unhappiness, so I have learned to avoid this.

How do I do this? By knowing myself deeply. By knowing what I really value. By having compassion for myself and also knowing that everyone else is swept up in their own drama and will likely not notice my stuff.

Be an under-achiever

I did a whole article/podcast on the topic of being an anti-hustle entrepreneur. But in short…

I have a business I “should”be promoting.

If I promoted more, I could make more money. I could get more followers.

What if I don’t get my ideas out into the world fast enough? What if someone beats me to it?

I work to discard this line of thinking.

If I’m on a clinical assignment, the last thing I want to do – after 10 hours of talking to patients, doing anesthesia in a high-alert state, and interacting with a whole healthcare team and everything that goes along with that – is work on my business! Instead, on those days, I end up throwing together a simple dinner, getting into an epsom salt bath with my red light face mask and watching Youtube videos about skincare and makeup.

I will say that if you have side interests, whether they’re business-related or just hobbies, you have to find a time to work on them that works for you. For me, this is usually an hour or so before bed. In an ideal world, I’d like to be doing this stuff in the morning, but even on non-anesthesia days, life often gets in the way of that… especially because I homeschool my child. I fit in interviews for the podcast in the mornings, but the writing and reading and preparation are often done after 8 pm.

This is more about embracing abundance and eschewing scarcity. The work will be there, and it will get done in time. I’m not in a hurry… and that’s liberating.

Some nuts, bolts and disclaimers

I admit I’m fortunate to be married to someone with a flexible work location and schedule that allows me to be gone for 5-6 days at a time and can shoulder the parenting and household. I understand not everyone has this, but not everyone would want to do the work travel and on-off schedule I do, either. My point in bringing this up is to get help. If it is family or hired help it doesn’t matter, get help where you need it.

I may get lost in a scroll on socials at times, but I don’t watch TV shows. I don’t read novels, don’t listen to true crime podcasts. Having to keep up with those things requires a tremendous amount of time, and I just don’t care about them enough. I’d rather spend my non-working time exercising or taking a hike w/ my family, cooking dinner, etc. Maybe you really love a particular genre of entertainment; that is fine, but make sure you’re intentional about how you’re spending your frivolous time.

Nothing worth doing is worth sleep deprivation. I stop everything typically around 9 or 930 and go to bed. For the sake of your health, make sure sleep is at the top of your priority list, because without sleep, you’ll be hard-pressed during the day to be balanced in terms your emotions, your physical performance, even your appetite.

What do you think of how I do work-life balance? Do you agree or disagree with my approach? Leave a comment below to share your thoughts!